Tomorrow or No Tomorrow: Here Comes Tiger!
“Even though the world should see the end tomorrow, I will plant an apple tree.”
--Benedict de Spinoza, Netherlands
June 15, 2008: On a beautiful Sunday in the late afternoon, Tiger Woods holds his putter 12 feet away for birdie from the 72nd hole. Anticipation intensifies his grip. Sitting cross-legged on my bed, I clutch the edge of my blanket. If the ball goes in, tomorrow, Monday, Tiger will play an 18-hole playoff against Rocco Mediate. Rocco is in the scoring room waiting and watching Tiger’s 18th hole with his arms folded. If it does not go in, Rocco Mediate will be the champion of the US Open 2008.
Tomorrow! Or No Tomorrow!
In his determined and focused expression, I can hear Tiger assuring himself: “I can do it!” “I have to do it!” “I have done it before!” All he needs to do is make a god stroke and hope that gravity takes over.
I scream from my bed: “Tomorrow!” “Tomorrow!” “Playoff… Playoff… Playoff…”
Tiger hits the ball and I, with the blanket’s edge serving as my golf club, imitate by striking the air.
Tiger hits it firmly and keeps his head down. Crouching like a Tiger, I wrap my head in my blanket and peer up at the screen from underneath my blanket’s fold.
The ball is moving …
The ball is moving…
The ball is moving … bumping… and swirls into the back corner of the cup without an inch to spare.
Tiger’s putt from 12 feet away … only barely gets i—n, I—n. I—n!
I leap from my bed and almost hit the ceiling. As I land, my blanket-entangled foot catapults me to the floor. I cradle my head in my arms to protect my recently-operated brain from my nearby dresser, as I roll dangerously toward it. I am recuperating from my fourth brain surgery following my recent brain aneurism rupture. Thank god, I did not hit my head against anything, I thought. Sitting on the floor, I cry: “I knew it. I knew it, he’d make it.” Tiger has done it again.
This pivotal shot brought Tiger into tomorrow.
I sit on the floor in tears, in joy, and in excitement.
In my bedroom on the floor, I go crazy with cheers. The crowd has gone wild. There’s nothing like a “Tiger roar”.
Tiger is going crazy – head thrown back with his mouth gaping, he pumps his fists in the air, punching the air with triumph. Underneath the pandemonium, I can tell he’s roaring, too.
As Steve, Tiger’s caddy, runs up to Tiger, their hands meet in the air. That Hi Five between them sealed my hope that, with tiger’s determination and focus, I could heal my body totally.
This was my healing moment. Tiger was my healer in this moment. Just as Tiger believed that his determination and focus would bring him tomorrow for the playoffs, with determination and focus I should be able to sit or stand for more than one hour, which, at that time following my surgeries, I could not yet do.
There is nothing like seeing Tiger roar in victory.
To me, Tiger’s roar represents healing. There’s a reason why Tiger is Tiger …. Tiger is a healer of my illness.
I am grateful for the opportunity to witness greatness.
Since this pivotal shot brought Tiger’s tomorrow, I want Tiger to have many more tomorrows so that, like me, many people will have hope for healing their bodies and minds!
Even though I lost my voice for a week from cheering so loud, I knew this was my healing moment.
I would like to say to him:
Tiger, I feel your pain and suffering. You were on the top, and now have fallen to the bottom because you have misused your power. I can see that you use your pain and suffering as an opportunity to evaluate who you are and what you really want. Like peeling an onion, calming your mind reveals your more “true self”. This will help you to evaluate who you are, and then you will know what you need to do. The public is negative and criticizing you because of your “transgression”. I hope you understand the public is looking you as ‘Ideal Real Man’ because our world does not teach how ‘to be a real man’ and because our world does not know who is to be followed. I do not know how ‘to be a real man’ and you do not know how ‘to be a real man’. Our world does not know how ‘to be a real man’. Even Adam, the first man, could not be real man because he could not take responsibilities for his actions and was in denial with guilt.
Tiger, you will be the precursor of how ‘to be a real man’. The public will give you more credit if you grow and forge into excellence by getting up with your scar of shame. I know, with your determination and focus, that you can do that.
As a daughter of sharing food with love, a granddaughter of peace warrior’s wisdom from the Wars, and a great-granddaughter of a traditional Korean doctor who saved thousands of farmer’s life in my village of Korea, I am offering “Apple & Cabbage Salad with triple hot sauce” to you, Tiger, and readers to heal spiritually. Apple & Cabbage Salad contains five different tastes: salty from salted vegetables that kill harmful germs and produce beneficial germs, pungent from garlic, hot from red chili peppers, sour from apple cider vinegar, and sweet and crunchy from apple, honey, and nuts.
Apple & Cabbage Salad is spicy, very very hot, pungent, and chewy, but the sweetness of apple will overpower the other flavors in the end. Spiritually, this will give you enough nutrition to get up and start a new life. Extreme spiciness will help you burn and cleanse all the mistakes you have made and all the negativities you’ve encountered.
Tiger, since you are my healer and you were born to heal others, I want to see you more on the green field! I hope to see you in a red T-shirt and black pants, walking to the 18th hole with Steve carrying your golf bag, walking on a late Sunday afternoon to a cheering crowd. I hope to see your son waiting in a red jump suit, and your daughter waiting in a red one-piece dress. I hope to see you all more. I hope to see you more.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Singing for the Tears of the Moon
Do you know why you are here on this planet at this time?
Our grandmothers sent messages to the world--“Sing to guide those who have gone before us, bury what we carry in the grave” and “Study the minds of those who started wars and violence and heal them without shedding a drop of blood.”
I see that we need to start a new life without carrying the past; yet this will occur only after honoring the dead.
I have a dream of building a memorial park, a park that honors the dead through the living and the living through the dead. This is to sing for the tears of the moon—our grandmothers—the same moon witnessed our uncles’ and our aunts’ death, the same moon has lived with our history since the beginning, the same moon will shine tonight, the same moon will shine in our children’s future. In the center of the circle, there will be a monument for the dead souls who have gone before us. Their souls will be surrounded by four columns, representing four directions and the four seasons. This is to honor the dead souls as victims of violence. This is to honor the dead souls as victims of war. This is to honor the dead souls as victims of ethnic cleansing. This is to remember the dead souls who died without preparation, like those in The Nanking Massacre, The Indian Massacre, the two atomic bombings in Japan, The Holocaust, The Polish Massacre, The Cambodian Genocide, and the 9/11 attack. This is to remember the dead souls who never came back home after being kidnapped, like my great uncle and my aunts. This is to remember the dead souls whose wings were clipped, so they never had the chance to fly, like my father. At last, this is to mourn with people who lost their loved ones and are still in grief, like the families of those who died in the 9/11 attack. In order to mourn the dead through the living, four columns will be connected by a path with arrows that direct people to walk in a clockwise direction, like summer leading to fall and winter then back to spring. Whoever feels regret for the past and present violence can come to this memorial park to express their sorrow. And whoever wants to say, “Thank you” to the dead souls will be welcomed.
Our grandmothers sent messages to the world--“Sing to guide those who have gone before us, bury what we carry in the grave” and “Study the minds of those who started wars and violence and heal them without shedding a drop of blood.”
I see that we need to start a new life without carrying the past; yet this will occur only after honoring the dead.
I have a dream of building a memorial park, a park that honors the dead through the living and the living through the dead. This is to sing for the tears of the moon—our grandmothers—the same moon witnessed our uncles’ and our aunts’ death, the same moon has lived with our history since the beginning, the same moon will shine tonight, the same moon will shine in our children’s future. In the center of the circle, there will be a monument for the dead souls who have gone before us. Their souls will be surrounded by four columns, representing four directions and the four seasons. This is to honor the dead souls as victims of violence. This is to honor the dead souls as victims of war. This is to honor the dead souls as victims of ethnic cleansing. This is to remember the dead souls who died without preparation, like those in The Nanking Massacre, The Indian Massacre, the two atomic bombings in Japan, The Holocaust, The Polish Massacre, The Cambodian Genocide, and the 9/11 attack. This is to remember the dead souls who never came back home after being kidnapped, like my great uncle and my aunts. This is to remember the dead souls whose wings were clipped, so they never had the chance to fly, like my father. At last, this is to mourn with people who lost their loved ones and are still in grief, like the families of those who died in the 9/11 attack. In order to mourn the dead through the living, four columns will be connected by a path with arrows that direct people to walk in a clockwise direction, like summer leading to fall and winter then back to spring. Whoever feels regret for the past and present violence can come to this memorial park to express their sorrow. And whoever wants to say, “Thank you” to the dead souls will be welcomed.
The Dead Soul’s Railroad
As my hometown, “Dead Soul’s Railroad” is located in Iksan, South Korea. Because of the large number of people who died on that railroad, the village people called it the “Dead Soul’s Railroad.”
Located in Iksan, South Korea, this railroad line was built by the Japanese. Many people from the surrounding villages died during the aggressive military railway construction. This railroad was used to carry weapons to China during Japan’s imperialistic expansion. This railroad was also used during the Japanese Occupation of Korea (1910-1945), to take young Korean males to be used as human bullet shields and forced labors, and young Korean females were taken to be sex slaves for Japanese soldiers. Most of those taken away did not come back to our land, but died where they were taken. During the Korean War (1950-1953), a train full of people travelling on these tracks was fire-bombed, yet another deadly event on this rail line. Even after these brutal events, people disappeared and were found later floating on the river beneath this railroad line. That’s why the village people called it the “Dead Soul’s Railroad.”
Located in Iksan, South Korea, this railroad line was built by the Japanese. Many people from the surrounding villages died during the aggressive military railway construction. This railroad was used to carry weapons to China during Japan’s imperialistic expansion. This railroad was also used during the Japanese Occupation of Korea (1910-1945), to take young Korean males to be used as human bullet shields and forced labors, and young Korean females were taken to be sex slaves for Japanese soldiers. Most of those taken away did not come back to our land, but died where they were taken. During the Korean War (1950-1953), a train full of people travelling on these tracks was fire-bombed, yet another deadly event on this rail line. Even after these brutal events, people disappeared and were found later floating on the river beneath this railroad line. That’s why the village people called it the “Dead Soul’s Railroad.”
Sharing My Delicious Smile and Happiness
Sharing My Delicious Smile and Happiness
Two days before the first day of Spring, on March 18, 2010, I was walking on the street, Washington Ave, because it was a beautiful sunny morning. I wanted to open my heart to Father Sun to receive his energy, while I wanted my feet to be grounded in Mother Earth to receive her energy. I also wanted to make sure that I followed my instinct to understand Grandmother Moon’s instruction. Cheerful energy from Father Sun, cool energy from Mother Earth and contemplative energy from Grandmother Moon balance in harmony. I felt gratitude that I was here on this planet at this time to experience this interconnectedness and fullness, which bring richness and abundance. I prayed, thank you for fresh air, positive energy, and everything. What a beautiful world!
I saw six teenage students at a bus stop near Albany High school. Those kids were the unhappiest children in the whole world. Their faces were sad. No energy. No power. I looked at each one of them and sent my delicious smile and my positive energy. I also sent my love and my wish for them to be at peace. So I sent this to all 6 miserable students. They probably thought that I was crazy. The important thing was that I noticed their unhappiness and I wanted them to be happy. I hoped that they received my delicious smile and my positive energy. I sincerely wish they could feel my happy energy so that they could smile more and more.
Nowadays, I have been taking a bus to go to the library and to the school on purpose because I could see more people. The majority of people on the bus have the same facial expressions as the unhappiest teenagers on Washington Ave. I have noticed one lady, in her sixties, whose face was an extremely unhappy on our earth. Because she stared at me with an angry face, I had to think whether I caused her discomfort in any way. I realized that I stepped on her foot by mistake. I asked her, “Did I step on your feet?” She hissed with the fuming expression, “Yes.” I said with a big smile, “I am sorry. I did not mean it.” She was going to say something, but stopped talking to me when looking at my smiling face toward her. When I was about to get off the bus, I told her, “You have a wonderful day.” She looked at me and did not say anything. I saw her again this morning on 3/25/2010 on the bus. I spoke with a huge smile, “Good Morning. It is so cold. I have to get my gloves back.” She smiled back at me and said, “Yes, it is very cold.” I saw her smile! I did not realize before that she has one of the pretties smile on our earth. As I got off, I looked at her eyes—sending my delicious smile and my positive energy—and told her, “Even if it is cold, you have a wonderful day and enjoy the sun.” I beamed at her. If I see her again, I will tell her that she has a beautiful smile. I hope she realizes that she does and that she should smile more and more in her future.
Even in the library, school, or shopping mall, there are many unhappy faces. We are unhappy because our life seems to be fragile, unpredictable, and temporal. We are unhappy because our mind is filled with the feeling of insecurity, indignation, frustration, and anger. Therefore, we are running away—from each other—from you—from me—from friends—from family—from mother earth—from father sun—from grandmother moon—and from the universe.
Two days before the first day of Spring, on March 18, 2010, I was walking on the street, Washington Ave, because it was a beautiful sunny morning. I wanted to open my heart to Father Sun to receive his energy, while I wanted my feet to be grounded in Mother Earth to receive her energy. I also wanted to make sure that I followed my instinct to understand Grandmother Moon’s instruction. Cheerful energy from Father Sun, cool energy from Mother Earth and contemplative energy from Grandmother Moon balance in harmony. I felt gratitude that I was here on this planet at this time to experience this interconnectedness and fullness, which bring richness and abundance. I prayed, thank you for fresh air, positive energy, and everything. What a beautiful world!
I saw six teenage students at a bus stop near Albany High school. Those kids were the unhappiest children in the whole world. Their faces were sad. No energy. No power. I looked at each one of them and sent my delicious smile and my positive energy. I also sent my love and my wish for them to be at peace. So I sent this to all 6 miserable students. They probably thought that I was crazy. The important thing was that I noticed their unhappiness and I wanted them to be happy. I hoped that they received my delicious smile and my positive energy. I sincerely wish they could feel my happy energy so that they could smile more and more.
Nowadays, I have been taking a bus to go to the library and to the school on purpose because I could see more people. The majority of people on the bus have the same facial expressions as the unhappiest teenagers on Washington Ave. I have noticed one lady, in her sixties, whose face was an extremely unhappy on our earth. Because she stared at me with an angry face, I had to think whether I caused her discomfort in any way. I realized that I stepped on her foot by mistake. I asked her, “Did I step on your feet?” She hissed with the fuming expression, “Yes.” I said with a big smile, “I am sorry. I did not mean it.” She was going to say something, but stopped talking to me when looking at my smiling face toward her. When I was about to get off the bus, I told her, “You have a wonderful day.” She looked at me and did not say anything. I saw her again this morning on 3/25/2010 on the bus. I spoke with a huge smile, “Good Morning. It is so cold. I have to get my gloves back.” She smiled back at me and said, “Yes, it is very cold.” I saw her smile! I did not realize before that she has one of the pretties smile on our earth. As I got off, I looked at her eyes—sending my delicious smile and my positive energy—and told her, “Even if it is cold, you have a wonderful day and enjoy the sun.” I beamed at her. If I see her again, I will tell her that she has a beautiful smile. I hope she realizes that she does and that she should smile more and more in her future.
Even in the library, school, or shopping mall, there are many unhappy faces. We are unhappy because our life seems to be fragile, unpredictable, and temporal. We are unhappy because our mind is filled with the feeling of insecurity, indignation, frustration, and anger. Therefore, we are running away—from each other—from you—from me—from friends—from family—from mother earth—from father sun—from grandmother moon—and from the universe.
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